When giving our children English names, we looked online at long lists of names. We considered the sound of the names, their meanings, their spelling, and tried to incorporate our favorite places into them. Like most of our friends, we wanted to pick names that other kids will not tease them about.

But when the time came to pick Chinese names for our children, we went through a completely different process. Obviously, they still have to sound nice, but there are more important considerations.

According to Chinese tradition, a good name must supplement and complement a person's fortune. In Chinese fortune telling, there are five natural elements that govern a person's fortune: gold, wood, water, fire and earth. A life will be good if these elements are balanced. When a child is born, his birth year, month, day and hour will combine to give him eight characters, each representing a particular natural element. If all five elements are present in a child's eight characters, then the child will be more likely to live a balanced and harmonious life. But most of the time, a person's eight characters will be unbalanced. One would have abundance in one element but a deficiency in others. (In fact, some couples will purposefully schedule a caesarean section for their baby in order to secure a balanced five elements or eight characters for their child.)

This is where the proper naming of a child becomes paramount. A good name can make up for the deficiency in elements. For example, if one is lacking water, then having a name that contains water can solve that problem. However, picking the specific name is a job for the fortune telling experts. In addition to finding Chinese characters for a name that contain the right elements, one has to also note the number of strokes in the name. The number of strokes has to fit with one's elements. Otherwise, it would adversely affect one's fortune.

After we moved to China, I sought the advice of fortune tellers to select the proper Chinese names for our children. The amazing thing was, based on our children's eight characters, the fortune tellers were able to describe my children's personalities to me. Without ever seeing our children, their descriptions matched the reality quite accurately. Although I don't blindly believe in everything the fortune teller says, I still think there is merit in this ancient art. So, I worked with a fortune teller to pick Chinese names for our children in the hopes that they will have a more balanced disposition in life (and good fortune).

(selected from 101 Stories for Foreigners to Understand Chinese People by Yi S. Ellis and Bryan D. Ellis, published by China Intercontinental Press in 2012)